Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Remember

Yesterday I was on my way to Waco to do an assessment when I got a call and it was canceled.  I was in Hillsboro by this time so I thought I'd stop by and check on Hannah's memorial bench.  As I stood there looking at it, a woman came out of the building and asked me if she could help me.  I had to awkwardly reply, "no, I'm good.  This is my daughter's bench and I was in town so I stopped by."  She replied, "o.k." and went about her business.  My heart sank.  All of Hannah's friends have moved on to the next school, only one of her teachers aides is still at the elementary, and none of her teachers remain there.  The principal and assistant principal have all changed.  I came to realize that soon no one would even know who the little girl on the bench even was, who I was, or why this place was significant enough to our lives that we had a bench placed there.  The place that had once been such a big part of our lives would not even recognize us.  It breaks my heart, but such is grief.  It's sneaky and it's cruel.  You wake up going about your day only to be blindsided with a pain you would give anything not to feel.  A miserable realization that something so precious to you is forever gone from this world.  All I know is that I will never forget.  I will always stop and check on that beautiful memorial whenever I'm in town, and I will awkwardly announce my reason for being there every single time as well.  I will never ever forget.  Ever.

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